Technology has come a long way in the past few decades. These days, people can pretty much do anything they want on their smartphones or laptops. And while most of this technology is beneficial, there are some aspects that can be harmful to our relationships – including virtual infidelity. So what is virtual infidelity, and what does it mean for your marriage? Read on to find out.
How to know if you’re cheating online
If you’re worried that you or your partner may be cheating online, there are a few signs to look out for:
- He spends more time on the computer than usual
- He secretly uses the computer
- He receives or sends e-mails or messages that he does not want you to see
- He is interested in Web sites or chat rooms that he would not normally be interested in
If you catch your partner doing any of the above signs, try not to get confrontational or make assumptions about his behavior. Instead, give him the opportunity to open up and talk about what they do online and why they behave that way.
The consequences of virtual infidelity
While there are many risks associated with virtual infidelity, the most common one is that it can lead to physical cheating. If you’re spending all your time online chatting with someone else, likely, you’re not giving your partner the attention they need and deserve. This can lead to resentment and feelings of betrayal, which can ultimately ruin your relationship.
Another risk of virtual infidelity is that it can be addictive. Many people find themselves getting caught up in online affairs and before they know it, they’ve invested a lot of time and energy into something that’s not even real. This can be damaging to your mental health and relationship in the long run.
Finally, virtual infidelity can be damaging to your relationship because it can have a negative impact on your partner’s self-esteem. Cheating, in any form, is hurtful and damaging to the people who care about you. If you wouldn’t do something when they’re right next to you, why would you act differently because they’re not in the room?
The consequences of virtual infidelity can be devastating to a relationship. If you’re caught up in an online affair, it’s important to seek professional help. Your relationship is worth saving, and with the right tools and support, you can overcome virtual infidelity. If your partner is caught up in an online affair, it’s important to remain calm and not make assumptions about their behavior.
Virtual infidelity research and statistics
In a recent study of 4000 adults, over 60% of divorce filings involved one spouse having an online affair. In many of these cases, the online relationship had been going on for months or years before it was discovered. Additional statistics show the following:
- 80% of men and 60% of women admitted to sexting someone other than their partner
- 66% percent of those people were in committed relationships
- 80% of men and 50% of women admitted to having a sexual fantasy about someone other than their partner
- 80% of men and 40% of women admitted to engaging in online flirting with someone other than their partner
- 60% percent of those people were in committed relationships
Virtual infidelity is not going away. For more information on overcoming virtual infidelity and rebuilding trust after a betrayal, contact a marriage counselor today.
How to deal with virtual infidelity
Virtual infidelity is a growing problem among married couples these days, and it’s caused many marriages to end. According to one study, over 60% of divorce filings involved one spouse having an online affair. While the definition of cheating may be up for debate, it’s clear that this type of behavior is causing major problems in marriages across the country.
As technology becomes more and more central in our lives, it’s important to work with your spouse to establish boundaries that will keep you both happy and safe. While this type of infidelity is difficult to define, there are ways that you can work together to keep it from becoming a problem in your marriage. For example:
- Talk about your online behavior. Are you looking at anyone’s profile? Are they visiting profiles without your knowledge?
- Set aside time to talk about what you’re doing on the internet every day. If you don’t, it’s easy for one person to wonder if something else is going on behind their back.
- Turn off your phone and shut down your computer a few hours before bedtime. The last thing you need is to wake up in the middle of the night and check your phone for messages. If you’re worried about missing something important, schedule specific times each day when both spouses can use their devices without interruption.
- Establish a list of websites that are off-limits for everyone in the family. Instead of trying to block each individual site, give the password to one spouse so they can monitor everyone’s activity. This way, you can have peace of mind knowing that your kids are safe without involving them in the discussion about why these sites are off-limits.
These boundaries aren’t meant to suffocate you or your family, but instead to help you build a healthy relationship where trust is a priority. If you’re not sure what your spouse’s online behavior means, be open about it instead of going behind their back and spying on them. Chances are they have a good reason for being there that doesn’t involve meeting someone else, but if they aren’t willing to share with you, it’s time to reassess your relationship.
If you feel like your marriage is in danger, or if you can’t talk to your spouse about their behavior no matter what, you may want to consider divorce. Whether this type of infidelity is enough to break up a marriage has been hotly debated for years now, but it really seems to depend on the couple. If your spouse isn’t willing to change their behavior, you may not have any other options than to move forward with a separation or divorce.
